What I’m really thinking: The stay-at-home mum

‘I tell myself working mothers are just jealous of the opportunity I have and worried that I am a better mum. But I suspect they actually think I am a bit thick’

Click here for the rest of this sympathetic Guardian article.

3 Responses to “What I’m really thinking: The stay-at-home mum”

  1. Bolton Nurseries Says:

    There is nothing wrong with being a stay at home mother or father, and to be honest it is very hard work to even look after 1 child, let alone more!! Hats of to all of you who are stay at home parents.

  2. Micha Says:

    Great article, I am in the same situation facing the same comments and I could have not say it better myself! One thing I know for sure is that I will never regret giving my kids the most natural thing in the world in their first precious years of their lives and that is being with their mother. There is enough scientific evidence that the first 3 years of their lives are the most important to their healthy mental long term development. Well, I am/we are doing what is the best for them, not what suits me in this society. We have the hardest and the most important job in the world but only those who ever tried it will know….

  3. Julie Says:

    From my experience I believe that some working mothers do harbour feelings of insecurity regarding their choice to have an other care for their child/children. In the same way I know I as a full-time mum harbour insecurities about the choices I have made too. Full-time mothers are a reminder to working mothers that they are not ‘with’ their own children whilst they are at work and working mothers are a constant reminder to full-time mothers of life ‘without’ children. Both are unpleasant situtations for mothers to be in. That said, I have recently been told that “all full-time mums are mad” by a working mother who’d fleetingly forgotten I was a full-time mum and I also ran for school counsellor and was told by one or two other working mothers that although my previous work experience was impressive and extremely relevant to schools it didn’t count because I no longer worked. The fact that I was a mother caring full-time for her children actually went against me in the voting. I find it very disheartening that women are attacking each other in this way. I believe that the maternal instinct runs deep for the majority of mothers, it is so sad that instead of accepting each others choices we are on a destructive journey to defend against any mother making a different choice to that of our own. Women are involved in this extreme competition with each other where there can be no winners. This pattern of behaviour can only be detrimental to all women no matter what their life choices. There is so much energy wasted on this topic when we could be working together to improve the lot of mothers in general. Fair pay for all whether working in the home or outside of it, the acknowledgement by government and society in general that full-time mothers do an important job, decent childcare options for those who choose or who have to work. Family friendly working hours, workplace creches, better holiday entitlement, longer maternity leave. These are the things we should be united about, only then will women have the true freedom to make their own life choices. Imagine what life would be like if we all stood shoulder to shoulder to demand fairer rights for mothers in general.

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